The first day of nursery or kindergarten is easier if you prepare your child early: practise the morning routine, a short and clear goodbye ritual, sleep at suitable times, and small acts of independence (taking off shoes, eating alone). Just as important is managing your own emotions — children pick up on a parent’s anxiety. Below is a practical, step-by-step preparation.
A few weeks before
- Talk positively about nursery/kindergarten — “the place with toys and friends”, not as a separation.
- Visit the unit together, if possible, so the place is familiar.
- Adjust the sleep schedule gradually, towards the wake-up time of kindergarten days.
- Practise independence: washing hands, taking off shoes, eating alone, saying when they need the bathroom.
The morning routine
A predictable routine reduces stress:
- Wake up, breakfast, getting dressed — always in the same order.
- Prepare things the evening before (see what to pack in the bag).
- Leave enough time so the morning isn’t rushed.
The goodbye ritual
- Short and clear: a hug, a phrase (“see you after your nap”), then you leave. Prolonging the separation increases anxiety.
- Don’t sneak out without saying goodbye — the child needs predictability.
- A comfort object from home (a toy, a cloth) can help at the start.
Handling emotions (the child’s and yours)
- Crying at separation is normal and usually passes quickly after you leave. The teachers know how to soothe.
- Validate the feeling: “I know it’s hard, I’ll miss you too”.
- Stay calm and confident — the child takes on your mood.
Settling in doesn’t end on the first day
Settling in is a process of a few days/weeks. At nursery you even have a legal right to accompany your child in the first days — see settling in at nursery and kindergarten. Be patient with setbacks (a good week, then a hard one, is common).
If you’re still choosing the unit, see how to choose a kindergarten and from what age for nursery and kindergarten.
Frequently asked questions
How do I prepare my child for the first day of nursery? Practise the morning routine, independence (eating, taking off shoes, bathroom) and a short goodbye ritual, talk positively about the new place, and adjust sleep early.
Is it normal to cry at separation? Yes, it’s normal and usually passes quickly once you leave. A short, predictable goodbye helps more than a prolonged one.
Should I sneak out? No. Always say goodbye; sneaking out without a goodbye undermines the child’s trust.
How long does settling in take? Usually a few days to a few weeks, with possible setbacks. At nursery you have a legal right to accompany your child in the first days.
What helps the most? A predictable routine, independence practised in advance, a short goodbye ritual, and the parent’s calm.
Sources
- Parenting and settling-in guides (good pedagogical practice)
- Recommendations from teachers and early-education units
- For the right to accompany, see Government Decision 566/2022 in our settling-in guide
See all our sources on the data sources page.
Conclusion
Prepare the first day early: routine, independence, a short goodbye and your own calm. Crying is normal, and settling in is a process of a few weeks. You’ll find every nursery and kindergarten in Cluj-Napoca on the interactive piticluj.ro map.